Founder, Chesapeake Bay Death Doula

Carey M. Palmquist, MSM, EOLD

My name is Carey, and I am an end-of-life/death doula in my private practice, Chesapeake Bay Death Doula. I became an end-of-life doula because I believe that through the intimacy and vulnerability of discussions about death, we can create a special and sacred space to accept death as another phase of our magnificent humanity. As an end-of-life doula, I hope that together, we can create beautiful spaces for transitioning loved ones that will carry us through the grief that comes from profound loss.

My Story

As a young girl, my experiences of death were mysterious and macabre. Those dying were placed “over there” in a separate, quiet, dark room where, upon entering, we respectfully whispered and spoke over, through, about, and around the dying. Never to them. Never.

How tragically sad – for us all.

Through my personal life (and death) experiences, I have come to a profoundly different perspective on death, and I believe that even as our beloveds transition, they are to be celebrated, respected, and heard.

I decided to become an EOL doula after several significant people in my life passed away. The first was my closest friend, who died in her early 40s from a staggeringly aggressive cancer. She left behind two teenagers (a girl and a boy) and her husband. As her death neared, she closed herself off from everyone who loved her, and she died alone in her room with the door locked. I believe that with an end-of-life doula present, the experience of my friend’s death would have been different, not only for her but for those of us who loved her, especially her children.

Conversely, I have had the honor and privilege to be present with several friends and family members in transition who had a circle of care that prioritized the autonomy of the dying. While there is no escaping the incomprehensible grief of loss, peace can exist. Being present at death opened in me a desire to better understand and support those navigating end-of-life choices, planning, and emotional support.

The writing and work of Ram Dass changed me significantly after the death of a loved one. With a lifelong reputation as an anxious over-thinker, when confronted with his spiritual philosophy while navigating my grief, the idea of “be here now” changed me. And that is why I hope to be here for you.

Services

As an end-of-life doula, I offer compassionate, non-medical support to individuals and families navigating the emotional, spiritual, and practical aspects of dying and loss. My work centers on presence, dignity, and honoring each person’s unique experience.

End-of-Life Support

I provide steady, compassionate support for individuals and their loved ones during the dying process. This includes emotional presence, listening without judgment, gentle guidance, and advocacy for the wishes and autonomy of the person who is dying.

Obituary and Life Review Writing

When someone dies, families are often asked to summarize a life in the midst of shock, grief, and exhaustion. Decisions are rushed. Words feel impossible. And yet, telling a person’s story matters.

An obituary or life review is more than a record of dates and facts—it is an act of witnessing. It honors the fullness of a life, the relationships that shaped it, and the meaning it leaves behind. When done with care, this process can offer comfort, clarity, and connection at a time when everything feels unsteady.

For those nearing the end of life, participating in a life review can be deeply grounding and affirming. It allows space to reflect, to be heard, and to shape how one’s story is remembered. For loved ones, it can ease the burden of “getting it right” and create a lasting tribute rooted in truth, love, and presence.

Whether written in advance or after a death, these stories help families slow down, remember intentionally, and begin grieving with tenderness rather than overwhelm. They become something to return to—on anniversaries, in quiet moments, and across generations.

This work is about presence and about honoring a life well lived.

Ritual & Legacy Creation

I help families create meaningful, personal rituals that honor life—at the bedside, at the time of death, and beyond. These rituals may also support grief during death anniversaries and other milestones, offering grounding and remembrance when emotions resurface.

Grief Support & Guided Conversation

I facilitate thoughtful conversations around grief, loss, and what follows after death. These discussions create space for expression, understanding, and connection—helping individuals and families feel less alone in their experience.

Death Cafes

I host Death Cafes that encourage open, intimate conversations about death in a safe and welcoming environment. These gatherings are designed to explore our perceptions of mortality while reminding us of the importance of living fully and presently—be here now.

In-Person Presence & Bedside Care

I shine brightest at the bedside and prioritize in-person visits whenever possible. I serve my community wherever support is needed, including:

Private homes
Independent and assisted-living communities
Hospitals
Hospice and respite care settings
Skilled nursing facilities

I often continue accompanying individuals and families as care settings change, providing continuity and trusted presence throughout the journey.

Both in-person and virtual visits are available. Please reach out for a consultation, free of charge.

Palmquist_DeathDoula@outlook.com

(610) 235.7312