Carey M. Palmquist, MSM
End-of-Life Doula, Mentor, Speaker, Educator, Grief Coach, Offciant (she/her/hers)
I am an end-of-life (death) doula who believes that honest, timely conversations about death—held with intimacy and vulnerability—allow us to create a sacred space where death is understood not as an ending, but as a natural phase of our magnificent humanity.
I work alongside individuals and their loved ones to cultivate this space with compassion, clarity, and deep respect, offering support that honors both life and loss. Together, we move toward acceptance and understanding, creating a foundation that can gently carry all who are touched through the inevitable grief that accompanies profound change.
My Story (Because everyone has one to tell)
As a young girl, my early experiences of death felt mysterious and macabre. Those who were dying were placed “over there,” in a separate, quiet, darkened room. When we entered, we whispered—speaking over, around, and about the dying. Never to them. Never.
How tragically sad for us all.
Through my own life—and death—experiences, I have come to hold a profoundly different understanding of dying. I believe that even as our beloveds transition, they deserve to be honored, respected, and heard. Death is not a moment to withdraw from one another, but an invitation into presence, tenderness, and connection.
I became an end-of-life doula after several significant losses in my life. The first was my closest friend, who died in her early forties from a brutally aggressive cancer. She left behind her husband and two young children. As her death approached, she withdrew from everyone who loved her and ultimately died alone, behind a locked door. I often reflect on how different that experience might have been—had there been someone to hold space for her, and for those who loved her most, especially her children.
In contrast, I have also had the honor of accompanying friends and family members whose dying was held within a circle of care—one that centered the autonomy and voice of the person transitioning. While there is no escaping the profound grief of loss, I witnessed how peace, acceptance, and even beauty can coexist alongside it.
Being present at death awakened in me a deep desire to understand and support those navigating end-of-life choices, planning, and emotional care.
With a lifelong tendency to overthink, I found unexpected grounding in the writing and teachings of Ram Dass after the death of a loved one. Encountering his philosophy in the midst of grief—especially the invitation to “be here now”—shifted something fundamental in me.
And that is why I hope to be here for you.
